Let's Celebrate Some Wins

Feeling kinda unsuccessful at everything this week...in a reading slump, can't seem to keep the house clean, not feeling like an awesome parent, not doing much writing...so let's focus on the good and celebrate some wins instead of talking about all that, okay?

Max has started this thing where he comes and crawls into bed with me whatever time he wakes up in the morning because "I come to check on you." He will fall asleep...kinda...and sometimes he will let me sleep. It's endearing but annoying and it doesn't seem really worth it to try to return him to his own bed at that time of the morning because it's not in the end gonna buy me that much sleep. Before the time change it was generally okay with the occasional early morning, since the time change it has been consistently around 6:30 a.m.

This morning he did it and I was a teensy bit annoyed because we had a long day yesterday...fun...we went to hang out with Molly while Daddy had to go pick up computers in Portland...but long, and ALL I wanted today was to sleep in. I knew realistically that was going to be a hard one to pull off but I was a teensy bit annoyed. When he came to be with me I didn't at first turn over and snuggle him, just let him snuggle my back...which, honestly, at that point, he was okay with. And then I felt bad and turned over and gave him a quick hug but didn't really cuddle with him so much. Which, again, he didn't complain or get whiny, but at one point in his half asleep state he reached one hand around his back and just lightly touched my face like, are you still there, and that was seriously the sweetest moment. It's one of those things I want to always remember. 

He had a second endearing moment at bedtime to like bookend the day. Dinner was on the late side so bedtime was also on the late side and I was in get 'er done mode, just here are two train books, pick one, we're reading it and then off to bed. Well, James was...off on his own planet, as James so often is, and he busted in right as I was singing Max to sleep to talk about custody of a shoebox...this is so very James, and who is entitled to which box is a legitimate question around these parts. After he left, Max reached out in the dark and grabbed my mouth with his little hand like are you going to keep singing now?

Thursday was a holiday so Grandpa was here and that was nice...he wore them out. Seeing Grandpa and James teach each other about Veterans Day with the materials James got from the school was super endearing. Friday Auntie Molly took the day off and came to hang out with us. She and I took Max to a sushi lunch, which honestly he doesn't love but the kid would live on gyoza if given the opportunity so he did just fine. We went to pick James up from school and Auntie Molly surprised him which was fun but he was understandably jealous about the lunch. So we told him we would take him on a James date and we went to the bookstore. He really wanted a new activity book, which seemed fair, and after going through pretty much every one there he picked Mo Willems' Elephant and Piggie activity book which was the PERFECT choice for him. He's pretty much gotten all the way through it this weekend and has loved it. It's been super fun to watch. The kid is so creative...he draws better than I do, I think, certainly better than I did at seven and I love watching his brain come up with things. I had this giant stack of picture books to work through with him from the library this weekend...overkill on picture books, if I'm honest...but a lot of them were things I thought he'd like like Ada Twist, Scientist and a picture book biography of Leo Fender who just liked to tinker with things. And he did. I think he's starting to see that not everybody has a brain that works like his, that likes to construct things, and that is awesome.

So yeah. Little things, but things that feel good. Because parenting is hard and I don't always do it right and I lose my temper and I yell too loud and I am far from perfect. But I love them and they love me and each other and we are doing okay. I think my favorite moments are where they both run in to snuggle and I have my arms full of kid and just think...how did this happen? How is it possible that I'm the mom, that I have these two amazing people who as much as they drive me to distraction are my world and I love them so damn much. I'm so very lucky. And I wanted to write that down and celebrate that today. Even though my word counts are awful.

Media consumption...we just watched the quarter final of the Great British Baking Show and I legit cried. That show gives me all the good feels for real. I'm still binging on the Golden Girls...you know what, make fun of me if you like that show is GREAT. And I'm still in a reading slump so I'm sloooowly working my way through The Firekeeper's Daughter which is insane because it's a really good book and chapters end on cliffhangers and I'm just like, dude...why am I not into this? Also this week I started listening to Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe (it's read by Lin Manuel Miranda, it's quite well done) which I read in JUNE but the sequel is out and I wanted a refresher and for real I cannot remember so much of this book. Seriously, no idea what is wrong with my brain. But I press on. I need to finish The Firekeeper's Daughter, that one is for book group.

Today I'm grateful for comforting TV, time with my best friend and my kiddos, sleeping in...OH, I forgot to mention that part, after a bit in bed with Max Josh sent me back to bed and I got to sleep until 10, it was INCREDIBLE, a new cookbook, bookstore trips, DEAR reading with my kids, a cozy fireplace, and warm socks.