Day #26: Mama, Can We Have an Indoor Water Park?
Just after Christmas 2016 my dad was hospitalized for what we initially thought was a heart attack but what was discovered to be bilateral pulmonary embolisms and spent 5 days in the ICU. He worked really hard to make a recovery and that August was watching my stepbrother's son play in a baseball tournament and watching baseball in Fenway Park. I was so proud of him. His health has never been the same since, but every day we have had him since then has been a gift. My grandmother died of a pulmonary embolism at 67 and I never got to meet her. My Max, who was born in 2018, has gotten to know and love my dad and yells "Bump-ba!" when he hears Grandpa's voice on the phone, because of course we haven't seen him now in over a month.
During the stress of Dad's illness, James was also an energetic 2.5 year old. I remember, probably after the big fear was over but in the middle of that stress, not knowing what else to do, I climbed into the bathtub with him one afternoon, pulled the curtain closed, declared we were having an indoor water park, and just started spraying him with the shower sprayer. It warmed us both up, we both laughed a lot, and it helped ground me back to who I was and who I needed to be. I don't think we've done it since.
James doesn't remember a lot about Grandpa being sick. He was little. If you prompt him a little about what was going on at that time, he can remember a little bit but he is very fuzzy on the details. But he remembers that day when we made an indoor water park.
Fast forward to today. Max was napping, James had finished his school Zoom meeting, which went about as well as you'd expect, and we were all wondering what to do with ourselves. He looked at me over what I swear was his 40th snack of the day and said, "Mama, can we do an indoor water park?"
I almost said no. There were a hundred reasons to say no. What if the water leaked around the shower curtain and made a mess? What if Max woke up? What if it was cold? He's soooo much bigger now than he was at 2.5, what if we both don't fit in there? So I almost said no, but I didn't. I said sure.
We got in the bathtub, and yeah, it was cold. Even with the heat light on it was cold. And he is big, had his feet all over me. I wonder sometimes if he feels so ginormous now what it will feel like when he is 10. Or 14. But we sprayed each other and mostly just...laughed.
James and I had 4 years together before Max was born. 4 years as a stay at home mom spending my days with James. And it hasn't always been the easiest transition to having two of them. It was hard to get one on one time with him last year and then this year with him in school all day every day...forget it. Since he's been home I've been missing my one on one time with Max, which I was really starting to enjoy as he got bigger, but these days one on one time with James is a rare unicorn and sometimes I forget about the adventures we used to have and the games we used to play. It was really fun to sit in the bathtub with him and just...laugh. He's still so little. He still wants to crawl into my lap and snuggle and be read to and be sung to. It won't last. I've blinked and now he's about to be 6...10 and 14 are right around the corner.
So that was incredibly fun. And even got him clean. He was getting pretty stinky. No one has washed enough since all this started, that's for sure.
He also asked me this morning what life was like before television and I said I don't know but I know who does. So we called Grandpa this afternoon and asked him. I think he liked being asked. He told James that they listened to a lot more radio, that radio was more fun back then, and also that people talked to each other more. Grandpa was 14 years old when TV broadcasts first came to Montana. That blows my mind.
So yeah. These days and hours are really hard to fill. You can only go on so many walks and despite the fact that James thinks he would like to watch TV all day that isn't a solution either. So you have to get creative. But it also helps to say yes to things. Like an indoor water park. And just sitting laughing with one of my boys. Laughing is getting me through this, I swear to God.
Today I'm grateful for laughter, my dad, my James, flowers, walks, warm water, hot soup, good books, a supportive husband, Max saying yeah, and health. Every day my dad has lived since Christmas 2016 has been a blessing. I hope we all continue to see good health.
During the stress of Dad's illness, James was also an energetic 2.5 year old. I remember, probably after the big fear was over but in the middle of that stress, not knowing what else to do, I climbed into the bathtub with him one afternoon, pulled the curtain closed, declared we were having an indoor water park, and just started spraying him with the shower sprayer. It warmed us both up, we both laughed a lot, and it helped ground me back to who I was and who I needed to be. I don't think we've done it since.
James doesn't remember a lot about Grandpa being sick. He was little. If you prompt him a little about what was going on at that time, he can remember a little bit but he is very fuzzy on the details. But he remembers that day when we made an indoor water park.
Fast forward to today. Max was napping, James had finished his school Zoom meeting, which went about as well as you'd expect, and we were all wondering what to do with ourselves. He looked at me over what I swear was his 40th snack of the day and said, "Mama, can we do an indoor water park?"
I almost said no. There were a hundred reasons to say no. What if the water leaked around the shower curtain and made a mess? What if Max woke up? What if it was cold? He's soooo much bigger now than he was at 2.5, what if we both don't fit in there? So I almost said no, but I didn't. I said sure.
We got in the bathtub, and yeah, it was cold. Even with the heat light on it was cold. And he is big, had his feet all over me. I wonder sometimes if he feels so ginormous now what it will feel like when he is 10. Or 14. But we sprayed each other and mostly just...laughed.
James and I had 4 years together before Max was born. 4 years as a stay at home mom spending my days with James. And it hasn't always been the easiest transition to having two of them. It was hard to get one on one time with him last year and then this year with him in school all day every day...forget it. Since he's been home I've been missing my one on one time with Max, which I was really starting to enjoy as he got bigger, but these days one on one time with James is a rare unicorn and sometimes I forget about the adventures we used to have and the games we used to play. It was really fun to sit in the bathtub with him and just...laugh. He's still so little. He still wants to crawl into my lap and snuggle and be read to and be sung to. It won't last. I've blinked and now he's about to be 6...10 and 14 are right around the corner.
So that was incredibly fun. And even got him clean. He was getting pretty stinky. No one has washed enough since all this started, that's for sure.
He also asked me this morning what life was like before television and I said I don't know but I know who does. So we called Grandpa this afternoon and asked him. I think he liked being asked. He told James that they listened to a lot more radio, that radio was more fun back then, and also that people talked to each other more. Grandpa was 14 years old when TV broadcasts first came to Montana. That blows my mind.
So yeah. These days and hours are really hard to fill. You can only go on so many walks and despite the fact that James thinks he would like to watch TV all day that isn't a solution either. So you have to get creative. But it also helps to say yes to things. Like an indoor water park. And just sitting laughing with one of my boys. Laughing is getting me through this, I swear to God.
Today I'm grateful for laughter, my dad, my James, flowers, walks, warm water, hot soup, good books, a supportive husband, Max saying yeah, and health. Every day my dad has lived since Christmas 2016 has been a blessing. I hope we all continue to see good health.
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