Day #112: Birthdays, Anniversaries, Exhaustion, and Points in Between
Whew, it's been quite the week! And it's Wednesday!
Monday we hosted a birthday for my BFF forever and the kids' godmother. It was super fun. We had talked about a backyard campout in my yard, campgrounds still being closed, but at the end of the day no one wanted the hassle and we all decided a campfire would do nicely. We went for a walk in the woods and made many things over a fire and sang songs around it. It was so lovely and I do if I say so myself make the best lemon cake ever. We kept it small...her and two friends plus us in the backyard, still maintaining as much social distance as possible. It's amazing how normal social distancing is starting to feel.
It was a long day and a late night for my kids so yesterday they had something of a birthday hangover...watching them bicker while playing was less than fun and no one had the energy to want to do anything, even go for a drive.
There's also, as always, the dad factor. In the middle of the birthday festivities I got a text from my sister saying dad fell down again but it didn't seem as bad this time. Of course that made me worried and I spent a lot of time yesterday trying to get hold of him. Turns out it was something of an overreaction. He was sitting in a chair that collapsed. So not as big a thing as I thought. His feet and legs still trouble him, though, and his mobility is just not where any of us want it to be. His house is not ideal for someone who doesn't do stairs well. These transitions in life are hard but much harder in the time of global pandemic. Before all this went down he was looking at senior living options and had decided not to do it. We are all now very glad he's not in a senior living situation as those tend to be COVID hotbeds. But it's also not fun for him to be alone in his house as he struggles with mobility. But for today, anyway, much ado about nothing. Hoping to possibly see him this weekend since we weren't able to last weekend.
He's also a little blue because Monday was the 25th anniversary of my mom's passing. That feels almost impossible to believe. She was in my life for 16 years and has been gone from it 25. I am now 7 years younger than she was when she died. I'm not sure I've emotionally processed the anniversary yet. It doesn't hit me as hard as it once did. Time doesn't heal but it does make pain less acute. It was a tough day for dad, though.
Today I knew we had to go somewhere so we found a park and then went to get library books. That should have been enough...Max could go down then and I could work on dinner...spaghetti bolognese sauce that takes like 5 hours to cook but is so delish. Unfortunately, James woke Max after 20 minutes. He didn't mean to...he was looking for me...but it still made it a looooong afternoon. I was on Max duty at bedtime because Josh had a Zoom social thing. I didn't even bother trying to put him down. I just drove him.
Finding ways to fill the long summer days is a challenge but I am proud of the big brother James is. Even when he makes me crazy. And the big backyard sure helps.
Media consumption: I've been doing a challenge where I'm trying to read a 500+ page book. I don't have a lot of those, so the one I've been working on is Roughing it in the Bush, which is a memoir of a woman living in 1830s Canada, originally published in 1852. It's different from what I've been reading and has all the issues of writing of that time, but I'm not disliking it. It's going smoother than I thought it would. I'm past page 300 now, hoping to finish it on Friday, especially since I now have all these beautiful new library books to read. I'm also listening to The Poet X, which I read last year on audio. The audio is amazing. And slowly working my way through Richard Blanco's How to Love a Country poetry collection, which I hope to finish by the end of the month.
Today I'm thankful for my kids, a long drive, dark chocolate, yummy dinner, reading, the library, trees, and friends. And my family staying healthy and being here. And my mom. I'll be forever grateful for my mom.
Monday we hosted a birthday for my BFF forever and the kids' godmother. It was super fun. We had talked about a backyard campout in my yard, campgrounds still being closed, but at the end of the day no one wanted the hassle and we all decided a campfire would do nicely. We went for a walk in the woods and made many things over a fire and sang songs around it. It was so lovely and I do if I say so myself make the best lemon cake ever. We kept it small...her and two friends plus us in the backyard, still maintaining as much social distance as possible. It's amazing how normal social distancing is starting to feel.
It was a long day and a late night for my kids so yesterday they had something of a birthday hangover...watching them bicker while playing was less than fun and no one had the energy to want to do anything, even go for a drive.
There's also, as always, the dad factor. In the middle of the birthday festivities I got a text from my sister saying dad fell down again but it didn't seem as bad this time. Of course that made me worried and I spent a lot of time yesterday trying to get hold of him. Turns out it was something of an overreaction. He was sitting in a chair that collapsed. So not as big a thing as I thought. His feet and legs still trouble him, though, and his mobility is just not where any of us want it to be. His house is not ideal for someone who doesn't do stairs well. These transitions in life are hard but much harder in the time of global pandemic. Before all this went down he was looking at senior living options and had decided not to do it. We are all now very glad he's not in a senior living situation as those tend to be COVID hotbeds. But it's also not fun for him to be alone in his house as he struggles with mobility. But for today, anyway, much ado about nothing. Hoping to possibly see him this weekend since we weren't able to last weekend.
He's also a little blue because Monday was the 25th anniversary of my mom's passing. That feels almost impossible to believe. She was in my life for 16 years and has been gone from it 25. I am now 7 years younger than she was when she died. I'm not sure I've emotionally processed the anniversary yet. It doesn't hit me as hard as it once did. Time doesn't heal but it does make pain less acute. It was a tough day for dad, though.
Today I knew we had to go somewhere so we found a park and then went to get library books. That should have been enough...Max could go down then and I could work on dinner...spaghetti bolognese sauce that takes like 5 hours to cook but is so delish. Unfortunately, James woke Max after 20 minutes. He didn't mean to...he was looking for me...but it still made it a looooong afternoon. I was on Max duty at bedtime because Josh had a Zoom social thing. I didn't even bother trying to put him down. I just drove him.
Finding ways to fill the long summer days is a challenge but I am proud of the big brother James is. Even when he makes me crazy. And the big backyard sure helps.
Media consumption: I've been doing a challenge where I'm trying to read a 500+ page book. I don't have a lot of those, so the one I've been working on is Roughing it in the Bush, which is a memoir of a woman living in 1830s Canada, originally published in 1852. It's different from what I've been reading and has all the issues of writing of that time, but I'm not disliking it. It's going smoother than I thought it would. I'm past page 300 now, hoping to finish it on Friday, especially since I now have all these beautiful new library books to read. I'm also listening to The Poet X, which I read last year on audio. The audio is amazing. And slowly working my way through Richard Blanco's How to Love a Country poetry collection, which I hope to finish by the end of the month.
Today I'm thankful for my kids, a long drive, dark chocolate, yummy dinner, reading, the library, trees, and friends. And my family staying healthy and being here. And my mom. I'll be forever grateful for my mom.
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